Really odd article about a couple who can only have sex to Talking Heads

The following nonsense article was posted by Tina Weymouth on the Tom Tom Club bulletin board on April 7, 2000.

Uh-oh, Love Comes To Town!
Another couple succumbs to the need to be Making Flippy Floppy to Talking Heads! Gee, I Wish You Wouldn't Say That.
Makes me think of all the Little Creatures running around as a result. They were Born Under Punches, the poor little things. Even the Animals do it. It's enough to drive you to Drugs. There is absolutely No Compassion for it. If only people would heed the Warning Sign in the first place. Personally, I'd rather see Houses In Motion than experience The Overload. For Once In A Lifetime, I am Crosseyed And Painless with wonder. When will these couples ever come up for Air? It's not as if we Pulled Up to The Great Curve. Heaven knows, what they're doing has been Seen And Not Seen. You'd think they'd experience some Tentative Decisions. But, nooooo, they'd rather Stay Hungry. All I can say is Don't Worry About The Government, because it sure wasn't in The Book I Read! Anyway, Who Is It? that does it, and why do they insist on calling it The Good Thing? And why should some of The Girls Want To Be With The Girls? No one can tell me Girlfriend Is Better. Ever heard that excuse from a guy about how if he doesn't do it he'll get Moon Rocks? And then there are all those guys who believe that old wives tale that they'll go Blind. I knew this one guy fancied himself a real Gangster of Love. He was really into Sax and Violins. Too much attention has been paid to the Television Man telling guys like him it's a Perfect World, so when they get there, telling themselves, yeah, This Must Be The Place, they find out that all Mr. Jones has is Love For Sale. All in all, you realize it's just another excuse for a Wild, Wild Life. Everyone wants to see how Love Goes To A Building On Fire. They can still remember Life During Wartime, but the truth is Memories Can't Wait. No one's interested in Nothing But Flowers anymore. I Found A Job in The Big Country so I can avoid the Cities. City of Dreams, what a joke. Ha, ha. Sing me that Naive Melody again. You can Take Me To The River, but you can't make me Stay Up Late. I Want To Live. Some people say that's a Road To Nowhere, a real Swamp. Of course, I'm still For Artists Only. It's a simple matter of Mind over Paper. If I ever have to Pull Up The Roots again, I'm Burning Down The House. Go ahead, put the Sugar On My Tongue: I'm no Psycho Killer! You could say I'm Not In Love, but Thanks For Sending Me An Angel just in case. . . .

With Our Love
Chris & Tina